Goal...

  People are moved by goals, right?

  I can't think of a single goal for me right now... I'm just moving with the flow.

  I'm tired and I really don't want to be worried. 

  I'm old enough to know that I need and deserve more from this life than what I got but I need to sort my feelings and manage to find a new direction in life that fits me.

  :)  I must say that I'm really proud about the way I'm handling this blog... I never would guessed that I could post like this and be so open about me. I'm really weird...

  Friday I'll have the day off and I'm planning on being out part of my day even if it rains. I'm not social but I like being outside! :) 

 "Do poepket ssumnida"

Weird...

  I consider myself a weird person and I think all people that know me think the same.

  It's not a bad thing, it's just that I gather a lot of different looks and tastes and they are not regular where I live.

  I'm not the girly type and I'm not concerned about my look or outfits - It's comfortable? So, that's all I need. But people find that strange...and once in a while they try to convince me that I should try to dress up more... what they don't understand is that I can do that but I just don't see the point of doing it.

  I like eastern / Asia a lot and that's also unusual.

  What can I say? I'm weird but I enjoy it. :)

 "Do poepket ssumnida"

Tattoos

  I would love to do one or two but...

  I don't want a name, a tribal or a regular one that we see everywhere.

  I can't even pick a theme, so I think about it a lot but I'm always undecided.

 

( web taken )

  I like this one. It's simple, clean and pretty.

 

 "Do poepket ssumnida"

Dreams

  I don't usually dream or at least I don't recall it.

  Sometimes I hear people talking about the dreams they had last night and I look at their happy or worried expressions and I wonder if dreaming is so important.

  Instead, I daydream a lot. I have lots of stories in my mind and different lives. I think that it's a way of escaping from my real life or to handle it perfectly (ahahahahahahah!)

  

  Two days ago, I left here a question: "What do you think would worry you the most: how to function with this new life or how to cover your own private existence?"

  For me, the last is the most accurate trouble...  I can´t even imagine what would happen if someone ever knew about all the silly stuff that crosses my mind.

"Do poepket ssumnida"

"A woman is..."

  I am, since two months ago, a big fan of Korean dramas.

  It's strange since I'm someone that doesn't watch TV and have no patience to observe silly acts done over and over. But I truly enjoy watching these dramas.

  My favourite so far has been Boys over flowers, a drama centred on the life of Jan Di, an average girl from a poor family that owns a dry cleaning store and that, after saving a boy from jumping off the roof of Shinhwa High School, is admitted into the school on a swimming scholarship. 

  There she meets the four richest and most spoiled boys around, known as the F4. She tries to avoid confrontation with the F4 at all cost because she knows what happens to those that stand against them, like what happened to the boy she saved.

  However, because of the only girl in Shinhwa High School that talks to her, Oh Min Ji, Jan Di is forced to declare war on the leader of the F4, Goo Joon Pyo. The F4 combines four messed up guys with lots of worries but that are really true friends - Goo Joon Pyo, the guy that doesn't admit any mistakes; Yoon Ji Hoo, the musician (my favourite);  So Yi Jung, the pottery guy and Song Woo Bin, the gangster.

  Now, I'm watching Secret Garden and Yoon Seul, one of the female main characters, said something that I really want to keep:

  "A woman is... no matter how common she is, she can be a queen; no matter how noble she is, she can be a maid; depending on how she is treated by the man who she loves."

"Do poepket ssumnida"

What if...

  What if, by some magic spell, one day you woke up exchanged with other person?

  We all have dreams, secrets, wishes and fears that we don't share with anyone. And we are made up considering all our previous experiences - what we do, what we like, how we live, who exists in our life, what we hate...

  But one day, we woke up in another body, with a completely different way of life and with experiences apart from ours.

  What do you think would worry you the most: how to function with this new life or how to cover your own private existence?

"Do poepket ssumnida"

What should I do? (Eoddeokajyo?)

  My life is already a mess and now I find out that the job I have is hurting me in a way that can be really dangerous.

  I always believed in karma - you know, what goes around, comes around - and even if I'm hot-headed I think I'm a good person (in general, at least). So, in my previous life I probably blew up a country or framed lots of people and now I'm paying for it...

 

  Ssshesssss, here I am whining again... 

  Changing the subject - what should be the priorities in someone's life? 

  What should we aim for?

  How can we find what really matters? And is it the same for everyone?

  :) I'll leave you today with 

"Eoddeokajyo - What should I do?", by Jang Geun Seok / A.N.Jell - "You're beautiful OST"

"Do poepket ssumnida"

Girls always fall for the bad guy?

  "A week has passed and Lilly's place almost feels like a home. She managed to get the sofa delivered before the weekend and now only little details and personal touches are missing. She still needs to find a place to put her favourite decorations items - a replica of the statue of Nike and a fairy made with organic materials. And she needs curtains and the perfect pendant lamp for the living room. 

  She's seated on the long-chair, admiring all the hard work she has done. She must feel proud because the outcome is great.

  Tomorrow is Saturday and she decided to go out for a walk, a little of fresh air and to observe the neighbourhood. She didn't saw a single person all week, except the bakery girl. She's also a little sad because her neighbour just vanished. She left him the guide for shopping in the mailbox but he didn't said thanks, he didn't even left her a note about it."

  Hummm today's topic - Is it true that girls always fall for the bad guy?

  It seems to exist a contradiction with other of those ideas about relationships - All the good guys are taken.
  Which one is true?

  Or bad guys turn into good guys when they fall in for true love and just marry?

  

  In my opinion, if a guy really loves his girl, he will always be good to her no matter what. That means commitment.

"Do poepket ssumnida"

It's raining again...

  Rain... 

  Lily was sitting by the window, like she always does in raining days. She loves to watch the rain falling down and listening to the sound of it. It makes all her troubles disappear for a while.

  Sipping her tea, while looking out was preventing her from crying. Last week was something surreal for her... it was the end of a life chapter and she is now completely lost.

  She just finished moving to this one bedroom apartment and now she has to start over. 

  She turns her head slowly. The whole place needs to be painted and cleaned. But it's her space and it means a new beginning.

  Even without noticing, she smiled. There's some new opportunities coming from this. 


  :) Sometimes we look to someone that passes by and, for no reason, we wonder about his life. It's weird! It makes me wonder about what other think about me when that happens... it's troublesome for someone like me. I worry to much... :)

"Do poepket ssumnida" 

Mikan and Natsume - manga :)

  I enjoy reading manga. :) It's something I do everyday, even if it's just a little.

  But because manga is not available in my country, I read it on line and sometimes I have to wait a lot for a new chapter. :) So, I want to thank all those people that do the free translations and that allow me to have so much fun reading it. Thank you fan subs!!!!

  Usually I pick drama stories... I get attracted to them and after that I fall in love with the stories, the characters...

  The image above, the only image I kept from all the manga I read so far, is from "Gakuen Alice", a Japanese manga by Higuchi Tachibana. It's Mikan and Natsume.

  "Mikan Sakura is an orphan who lives in the countryside of Japan. When her best friend, Hotaru, transfers away to a prestigious school in Tokyo, Mikan follows her. The school is actually an elite academy for the gifted people with “alices”. When Mikan arrives to the gates of the school, she encounters a teacher and gets enrolled due to a series of events. She is told that she has a unique, rare “alice”. There, she immediately meets Natsume. They get along like fire and water, yet they are undeniably attracted to one another. She also gets the chance to meet other people; like Natsume’s caring best friend Ruka, or Iinchou, the class rep. Despite her initial view of the so-called greatness of the school, she slowly finds out that beneath the grand facade of the academy, there is a never-ending stream of lies and buried secrets."    

in mangafox.com

"Do poepket ssumnida" 

Whining

  Ssshesss

  It looks like I'm whining in some of my previous posts...

  I think I'll cancel my trip to Italy, next year. I have something to do with the money of that trip that I think it's more important for me as a person...

  Travel is something that I really enjoy doing and for the last four years I went on vacation for Spain, France, England and Belgium. London was an amazing surprise for me because I didn't thought I was going to like it so much. Paris was a big disappointment. Belgium was full of choco and pretty buildings and cartoon.

  I still want to travel to lots of places - Italy, Greece, Japan are my top preferences. 

"Do poepket ssumnida"

Books

  I'm a book eater. I read a lot and I truly enjoy it every time. The ones I like the most are fantastic books - heroes, mystique beings, old secrets and mysteries.

  The first fantastic author I followed was Juliet Marillier and I read everything from her since then. Juliet’s novels combine historical fiction, folkloric fantasy, romance and family drama and I really enjoy reading her books because they are always sensitive and character caring :)

"Do poepket ssumnida"

What does it takes for someone...

  What does it takes for someone to get on their feet and make a big change in his life?

  I really need a change and I think about it a lot but how can I do it?

  I don't really know where to turn... 

  "Eoddeokajyo?"

  I don't really know where to start, where to go, what to do... it feels like I'm so lost or so messed up that I can't do anything. There are days when I wake up with the feeling that I can do anything and that my fighting spirit is with me once again but it doesn't last... 

  People blame their lack of will to make things happen on the lack of money, others trust, others help... whatever but that is not it... the only person to blame is really us. I know that... but "Eoddeokajyo?"

  

  I need to find my strenght and move forward because, in the end, the only person we're really stuck for all our lives is with ourselves... so, we should be happy and comfortable in our skin, right?

"Do poepket ssumnida"

It's true that opposites get attracted?

  There's a saying about this but is it true?

  The more I think about it, the more I believe in it. Well, if they are opposites they already have something in common, right?

  The truth is that if something or someone is alike, there's nothing to add. If I have the same shirt twice, will others notice that it's not the same? Of course not. If someone like the same music genre as me, that's great when it's time to drive long distances with that person because we won't fight about what to hear... but if tastes were different, I would learn / "earn" more.

"Do poepket ssumnida"

When should we be polite and when should we get all the anger out?

  Sometimes there are situations that make us really stressful or that really mess with our plans or tastes and we don't really know how to act /deal with...

  I'm hot-headed so it's easy to read when I'm happy or mad. :) People say that my eyes roll, my face turns red and I move very quickly when I'm angry. What to do... I really can't control that. But I can, or I should, control what leaves my mouth at those times... and that is something I'm trying to do more. I used to let go everything out without even think about it too much but we grow up and learn, or not, how to be correct, how to be polite, how to swallow stuff...

  I still have problems with dealing with injustice and with wrong paths... I think I always will - so I talk to much... I should be polite and wave or shake my head slowly but that's not me... I vent all my anger. 

  Should I let myself grow up that way? Should I be more polite, even when I feel that something is wrong?
  Hummm... probably not... I rather be scolded.

"Do poepket ssumnida"

What to do when life gives us lemons... give back bitter lemonade?

  : p   Just kidding!!!

   Although I'm a person that really enjoys being quiet in her place... listening to music and reading a book, there are times when I wish to be more social. To go out and meet people that are interesting to talk to and that are somehow different of me.

  But how to do that? I'm too self-conscious and turned to the inside...

  Even if others try to drag me around and help me, usually I run the other way - that's just the way I am.

  Anyway, I think I need to go out more... drink a tea, make some shopping, read a book outside, watch the river while listening to music... and that I can do by myself, right?

"Do poepket ssumnida"

How much people know us

  People tend to think that because they live together or they share a lot of time together or they talk a lot with each other or they know each other for so many years, that they know the other person well, right?

  Is it really true?

  I can know the tastes of someone - that means I know him?

  I can understand someone's fears - that means I know him?

  I think I know what the other is thinking because of all the time I know him - but is that really true?

  People have so many faces and so many moments when they react to things as they come by...

  It may seem weird but I feel like everyday I know something new about me... so, how can someone think that he knows me well?

  If even I feel strange in my "own shoes" when I deal with things in an unusual way but that happen because of that specific moment, of my feelings and thoughts at that time, of everything that has been in my mind lately and all I've been through... so how can someone think that he knows me well?

  :) People have an image of us (and we have an image of others). That image represents us in certain time and place that can last short or long periods of time but that really doesn't define us.

"Do poepket ssumnida"

Song of the moment - Liszt - La romanesca

Liszt - La romanesca (Ji Hoo theme)

  And because I really wished I had a Ji Hoo in my life, I came to this - boys like this one really don't exist but a girl can dream, right?

  Life can be a mess and people can regret a lot of things, because of something they did or because of something they didn't do. It's better if it's because something they did because, at least, they can say they tried but things didn't worked out. Even if this is easier to say than to actually do :) (yes, it's easy talk, I know) I would love to grow up that feeling inside of me - that no matter what, all I should do is be honest with my own feelings and have no regrets. :) Maybe one day... Life is to hectic and we don't live alone, we depend on others in different degrees and that pushes us to hide our true selves sometimes.

"Do poepket ssumnida"

Rain and thunders

  It's the second night of rain and thunders here... I like rain when I'm at home or in another cosy place or when I'm outside because I feel like it but thunders make me nervous, so much that I can't sleep well or be at ease.

  

  I was thinking about this whole blogging thing:

  - Why am I writing it in english? Why my goodbye sentence is in korean while my introduction is in portuguese? 

   :)  Yes, I'm that weird... portuguese is my main language; english is my second language and even if it may be incorrect is universal and it's a nice way for me to express myself; korean is my new passion (I'm in love with manhwa, k-pop and drama series).

  - What to write and when to write?

  Should I talk about me? About my experiences or thoughts? About my reading habits? 

  And can I do it everyday or once a week? It's OK if I do it all days for a week and then just come back a month later?

  :) Since I'm doing this just for myself, I decided to put aside all of these questions... It really doesn´t matter, right?

Edit: I need to add something to this post that probably won't make any sense to me next week... but... I want a Ji Hoo in my life. :)

"Do poepket ssumnida"

For a boy is never "Just because"

  :) I was watching a drama and a guy said this to the girl he likes as an advice.

  It made me think if boys and girls act different towards opposite gender friends and/or love interest...

  I believe that the "Just because" actions are very honest and truly come from the heart with the only intention of make the other person happy. But when I think about it, it's true that a girl is more at ease to do "Just because" actions. Boys seemed to only do "Just because" actions towards the girl they have interest in and it's OK, I guess... at least is a simple way to show your feelings and being careless about what others may say.

"Do poepket ssumnida"

Can I make this work?

  For some years now, I've been thinking about making a blog. But because I don't really like to follow the trends and because I'm not sure that I can keep a blog, I never took the first step.

  Can I make this work?

  At least I'm sure that I won't advertise this... I'll see what can I do and let it be in the web, exposed, with no intentions of having followers, fans, haters or whatever.

"Do poepket ssumnida"